Bloggity Blog Blog.

Another post. Crazy.

2008-07-16T00:21:59Z

This summer is summer of stuff to do. I have a summer, because i'm in school I decree it. So, I spent a lot of time sleeping on some friends' couch doing nothing of anything but playing games. then we went to A-Kon, and then went to AX. I didnt even goto either convention,b ut stayed in the hotel and had a hell of a lot more fun than going to said conventions. I busted my chin open in LA and its still healing. Yet again, I dont get medical attention. I only goto the doctor for lifethreatening emergencies... and i was out of state when this possibly was one of those said emergencies. So, i'm gonna get a wicked scar on my face... and as penance, I had to shave my facial hair, which i was thinking about anyway. now I have a cowboy mustache which looks goofy (especially with long ass hair) but its to remind myself to always be careful when walking.

I've been working nonstop on the website or thinking about it, with nothing really to show for it. However, we did throw probably the BIGGEST room party at the biggest anime convention (52,000 people) without even blinking. Thats how texans roll. :P Promoting the website goes as planned, we just need content. /headdesk.

I gotta get more focused on "real life" things, as school starts again at the end of next month and I have to acquire funds to do as such without working during the semester (we all know my attention spans, as updating this or communicating with people I know has gone lax since entering school).

I still dont know what I want to be when i "grow up"... but I really cant see any difference between what thats supposed to be and what I have done or am doing now. Does that mean I'll never have a sense of satisfaction in life? I suppose it comes with the territory, i've already done everything i was supposed to do, including getting married.

I have no view of the future, and everything seems trivial. Yet, I push forth with grandiose plans hoping that one of them falls into place and that will give me direction. yes, even people like me like to be told what to do, and to be reassured that what we are doing is correct and working.

On a lighter note, I seem to have gotten EVERYONE that i've been hanging around with addicted to the entire Kamen Rider series.
If you havent watched it yet, I have something for you to see. :P Either that, or Macross Frontier. Just watch episodes 6 + 7... its 44 minutes that you wont regret. Its not even an hour of your time, and its groundbreaking greatness. If you're not an anime fan, but a Battlestar Galactica fan, Watch 6 + 7. Seriously. Do it now.

Need to learn to focus.

2008-06-05T03:57:35Z

I've been lounging around. Its actually really fun... but i NEED to get a job. Gotta pay for AX, and then for school. Still, though... watching Macross, playing video games... listening to music while lounging midday... i havent done this sort of chilling in a long time.

Gotta work more on the website... its coming along... but i'm lazy as to writing articles. I'm becoming more comfortable with the laptop, so its becoming even more fun to be mobile active. Its totally boss that the thing can run without problems, AND the battery works.

Anyway, Kamen Rider Kabuto marathon, and Dresden Files marathon continues... :P

Tired.... but need more drinking

2008-06-02T20:07:36Z

A-Kon is over, and we were wrecking shop there. Not as much promotion for the site, but a lot of great ideas, and some EPIC gaming. I'm gonna get back into playing Rival Schools. Great part is, I didnt even hit the con area up really at all. I didnt go into the gaming room once, no panels, nothing. Just was in the hotel or wandering in the common areas. As a precursor to AnimeExpo, Expo looks to be promising. Now to get the site going full-force beforehand.

Gods, my body hurts though.

2 weeks?!?! already? LOL. nothing == done.

2008-05-21T07:02:23Z

I guess its just about 2 weeks now since I've left school... and I havent done a damn thing. Bad? Yes, and no. As long as I attend the next semester of school, nothing REALLY has to occur. At least, thats what i'm telling myself. I'm squandering the little money I have from the tax return... spending it on food and such. I know i'll need that money later for like... school related stuffs. But i'm spending time resorting back into a lifestyle I left a long time ago. Sometimes, its nice to be able to slip back in and not miss a beat, though. I'm still good enough on halo to compete against friends, and am better at fighting games than them all. :P

I BEAT Rock Band Drums on HARD SOLO TOUR. Oh, yes... I am domination. I'm playing most songs on Expert now... and passing them. During this week, something else clicked again. Probably since I've been playing on a small tv in a small room at awkward angles, now that I have room to stretch out and arrange things... my practice while walking around school or sitting in class flailing my arms and repeatedly tapping my foot on the ground payed off. Well, is paying off. I still need to be able to roll, but my rolls are coming along well.

I also finally got that Street Fighter achievement. So, I have 12/12 on that one. Damn that game. Now I dont have to play it again, though. :P

Hooked up my dreamcast and played Triggerheart Exelica. Its available on Xboxlive... its a pretty awesome shooter. I still might get it for Xbox, but I wanted it for DC,a nd hooked it up via VGA box, and put the monitor on its side (TATE MODE). Superb is the dreamcast, and its abilities. :P I need to play some Jojo's bizarre adventure tonight.

Else, i'm still trying to focus and get things done with the website, as always. Obsess, obsess, obsess... that is my way. I'm at the point of almost giving up... what makes me think that I can have something uber successful when if it were so easy, wouldnt everyone do it? Then again, I did just come up with a Netrunning game that will sell awesomely. You play a netrunner vs other netrunners.... and it plays like an RTS. Your "troops" are programs.

More about it when I end up designing it.

Moar Gaming

2008-05-17T22:18:56Z

Still sitting around playing games. I've been trying to get the win Street Fighter without losing a round achievement, but I cant get it, even on the "lowest" difficult. Funny thing is, i can do it all the time on the hardest difficulty level on Super Nintendo. So... I think that they've changed what "difficulty" means... and added some adaptive AI to the game.

I played the DragonBall Z game demo for 360. That game looks so fluid, its actually an impressive DBZ game. Control scheme remains the same, but the way the game flows is quite impressive. I bought Chessmaster Live. Since I technically am the president of the Chess Club at the University of Houston, one of my goals is to get good at chess this summer, so i can properly represent Chess Club next semester. Yes, I know, I'm giving myself too many tasks to undertake as usual. But its chess... it should be fun. Lets hope I can keep it fun, instead of another self depreciating event.

We watched a bunch of stuff on the xbox the past 2 days since I figured out we could do all that stuff with it. Lots of Kamen Rider, including the Kamen Rider The First movie... which was tremendously excellent. We were all cheering as the fights progressed. Twas excellent. Also, watched some Blake's 7, watched the new RAMBO movie, which was also mucho excellente. Carnage, galore, rambo learns nothing in the movie, and is dragged back into carnage. Also, watched some Captain Tsubasa!! I forgot I had episodes in spanish on a disc, and some of them worked. While I've been here they have FSC (Fox Soccer Channel) on their cable, so I've been watching A LOT of Futbol. Not to mention I had started reading the Captain Tsubasa manga shortly before finals, and got all the way to ch50. Yay, soccer!

We'll probably play enhanced Double Dragon tonight all the way through or something. Its only $5. Screw the wii, for $5 I can play online WITH friends in an ENHANCED version of the game with AWESOME music remixes. Plus, if I want, I can play the original as well.

Cant wait for Bionic Commando. Its gonna be sexy.

perfectionism returns

2008-05-16T11:44:26Z

However far I tried my best to remove myself from having to 100% any game... and when I finally kinda accomplished eliminating that part of myself, now Xboxlive brings you achievements... badges to wear for doing the impossible.

So, yeah. More or less they give me things to unlock and obsess about. Yay for them? At least, one can feel more accomplished worrying so hard to get every ending... not anymore just to say they did.

The ultimate thing about the xbox, it'll play divx (maybe xvid) .avi files. Everyone talks about the networking it can do... but it can read data DVDs and play them. So, all the dvds i've archived of like, say, all of farscape, etc... now I can just put them in my xbox and play them. Its even more reason to backup all my data. It'll just read straight off of them.

What this means, aside of my rambling, is if you have a 360, you can now watch .avi files easily on your tv. Just burn a data DVD or data CD and blammo! Download a movie while watching one. Its torrent haven.

I'm completely tired, but dont want to sleep. Less gaming can occur then. :P

360 is my friend.

2008-05-14T09:14:41Z

I'm probably gonna be hip attached to that thing from now on. The online community setup is just awesome... and multiplayer arcade games playable with friends online for 5 bucks is just amazing.

Wartech : Senko no Ronde is an AWESOME game. Its part Virtual-On, part Psychic Force, with a bullet hell game merged. Its deep, or so it seems. I'm really excited about it... even though its gotten bad reviews or something. But its a fighting game, I keep playing... for fun. I'm beating the game with all the characters... and learning new tactics. Best thing was, the game was $10.

OMGZ

2008-05-13T06:29:55Z

Had no internet since thur (leaving dorms). Have been staying at a friends house, and there internet was off until today. Total received emails : 1. No real forum posts, and nobody really is trying to get a hold of me, prolly... I have no phone. So, I guess i'm semi off the radar.

Being off the radar does cost more money, for some reason though.

Oh noes

2008-05-09T12:56:15Z

The light is now up. Daylight is scary, but we're still playing video games. Summer is cool.

Mental Musing #2250.64

2008-05-08T06:33:41Z

Waiting for tomorrows test... then school is over, and I have to reacquaint myself to the outside world. Plus, move all my stuff into my car. I get to live with my parents again. Joy.

On the flipside, I get a real summer break, for once since... highschool. (12 years)

I think about how to change. What it takes to change a persons thoughts. For a person to wake up one day, and become a different person. Clothes? Possibly. Sleeping arrangements? Likely. Theres possibly a combination of the sets... life's global unity, a series of things put into place to reflect and combine into the unity of self, subconsciously transforming you when you sleep.

Like when you are younger and put up a new picture, poster, whatever. You place it so you will see it, so every day you'll wake up and glance at it. These things in your environment reflect the person you want to become. When you light the room the way you want it, to reflect your inner glow, or the darker half of yourself. The ambience becomes key.

Is there a point where these things become uninspiring. The feng shui, or ambience, of environment no longer can effect the inner you? There is no more joy in a simple print out of something meaningful? A flower, a favorite soccer team, a poem? Does it run out, or is it simple people close themselves off to the positive, in order to brace themselves to encounter the outside world, rather than just the neighborhood?

Tomorrow, maybe tomorrow, I can wake up a different person.

Just a thought.

sucks...

2008-05-04T09:02:28Z

Rewatching Farscape Season 2. It is awesomeness... but also sad.

I thought my Cal test was on Wed. Now, I find out its on Monday. I dont understand any of it. Math is hard.

Pass or fail, I want school to be over with. This semester is uninspiring as to how I function as a person. No matter how hard I tell myself to change, I can not.

oh noes

2008-04-30T07:23:24Z

After a shower, I feel more human. I had some epic gaming going on the past few days. However, I'm going to definitely fail my Chem final. Its way too extensive. Its all mult choice, though, so guessing gods had best be with me. I brutally failed the 3rd Calculus test... so all that grade resides in the final.

Why do the tests all come at once, and are hard to understand? I think i might have a learning disability I've just dealt with this entire time. Questions are confusing to me in these tests, and it takes me a few minutes to only understand what they want... let alone figure out how to get to that answer. Plus, too many formulas going on right now... and none of them make sense to me.

Blah. Need more extensive gaming cycles o' fun. Gotta get a decent laptop this summer, too.

Too much school.

2008-04-25T07:18:17Z

Its almost over... and then I dont have to worry about these classes any more. I get whole new classes. I get Japanese next semester. I'm uber-excited about that, cause i already probably know most of what is the first semester, so its a FREE 5 credit hour class... essentially. Plus, I can use that time to reestablish myself with the language, and ask the teacher things that pertain to way later in the course... and BE AHEAD IN A CLASS for once!

But for right now, I feel TERRIBLE. I'm not functioning at even half capacity, and I feel sick. I've got a test tomorrow (Calculus) which i'm likely to fail... and my history paper is still not done.

Once I get that hist paper done, and once I fail the test, I'll at least have some rest time before next week's insanities. I just wish I didnt feel, mentally , like trash.

Brain explosion.

2008-04-22T23:28:31Z

I got an 11/20 on the test. (55%). Thats passing in this school. I think I might have had some sort of mini aneurysm. Either allergies acted up or all the bad things i've been intaking to keep myself functional all broke into my eye, it was MEGA red and insane... and just one eye. Eye drops did clear it up though, but it looked like my brain had exploded. I felt that way too.

Now that THAT test is over, I gotta study for a calculus test, and write a paper for Honors History. Joy.

Failure Imminent

2008-04-22T06:07:23Z

Chem practice test doesnt make much sense, and its ALL calculations. This bodes not well. Test is tomorrow. Lahr. Even if I stay up all night, I dont think it'll help. I should just skip the test. :P

The part that WAS making sense, and I figured would be the "hard part" so thats what I looked over on the weekend, is no longer on the test. Lamesauce.

Total Slacker == me

2008-04-20T05:02:31Z

Its sat night, and i'm just starting my studying. and by Studying, I sorta mean looking quickly over the class notes, not understanding what the hell is going on.

I figure if I push myself (which I have to do anyway), i'll still have "time" enough to cram to pass at least one test. Still, the difficulty is mine. I wait forever to get started on things. Maybe next semester, I'll be ahead. But I did say that this semester.

It is easier to stay on task when i'm sitting around while other people are doing random other things. Much less me accidentally sleeping, which occurred earlier today. Took some pictures, not great ones. I need a better camera to do in focus pics. This camera again is lameXcity. But i'm trying to get action figure web comics started, as something I can do simply. I'm thinking more about the website, and would work on stuff (maybe tonight).

School needs to go away for now :P I want a summer vacation. Havent had one of those in forever. Winter break was kinda depressing, but summer should be fun. Roadtrips, and all, planned.

Back to "studying".

break-point (point break!)

2008-04-16T22:12:26Z

I'll probably fail at least one class this semester. Probably going to be math (i can pull off only one , chem or math). I should have taken precal instead of cal. It wasnt on the progression list, so i kinda thought it was like some summer course inbetweener or somesuch.

Oh well... sucked back into the world of school, worrying about these things until they all pass timewise.

I is hungry.

2008-04-13T21:07:09Z

I need to go get some mad foodage. I'm downloading torrent files, so I can hopefully access them when i'm on campus and retrieve some of these things i've been missing (terminator series, etc) They dont block torrent traffic, but the actual torrent trackers... so you have to get those elsewhere. Silly.

I became vice-president of the anime club that I had started 10 years ago. So, now I'm in a position of power again. Hopefully we can make it fun again... find new people and such. Sucks that already there is OLD drama thats coming back in. The whole old club thing I ran away from, its already infringing on present time. Sad. Its sad that these people have nothing to do but bring that shit back up. I was playing low-key too. So, i've set myself to either have epic success this time around, ,or fail again, and have to reset again.

Dont I have enough problems within myself, I dont need other people bringing things up to me? Ah, its my lot in life.

Right now, instead of fucking around, i need to try to PASS this semester. That needs to be my focus for the next month. Its just difficult... after putting so much into earlier this semester. I'm emotionally drained.

I'll feel better when I accomplish something, mayhaps?

Too awake...

2008-04-11T08:17:06Z

I sleep at odd times. Cant stay awake and active when I should be. Instead, during daytime hours, I'd rather hide away in dreams. Funny thing is, those dreams usually arent great. I just dont know what to do with being awake. Right now, i'm thwarting the math homework I should be doing. Yes, the class I'm already failing. This means, I'd better ACE the final, or I fail completely.

Elsewise, we took over Channel 6 tonight, and went live. Pirate TV returned. Then we got in trouble. I dont know how thats going to play out.. the current "executive committee" thinks they're cool and awesome, but none of them live on campus and have to watch the garbage on tv. I got it on tape. So, theres another videotape of me out there making a fool out of myself. The original 10 years ago version resides probably in a pawn shop in seattle, or a trashcan or something.... appended to the end of a copied VHS tape of TRON.

I need to reset [myself] again. Doesnt help that the playlist tonight seems to focus towards songs I shouldnt listen to (Xymox - Imagination, Cure - Letter to Elise)... even more proof that something must reset. I was roughly stable earlier this week, up until today. I wonder what changed... I've stayed away from here, writing things, documenting things... that otherwise i'd be worried I'd forget. Something must be up if I'm actually writing on this.

Yo Gabba Gabba is the GREATEST Show EVER.

Small sentences

2008-04-08T01:22:23Z

Failed the Calculus exam. Funny thing is, I got 24/30 on the part I totally fucked up on (free response), but only 30/70 on MULTIPLE CHOICE (3/7 questions correct). I'm slipping. I guess its "still passing" but a 54 isnt great.

Elsewise, lots of screwing around. Actually reading manga / watching anime. Something I havent done in forever. Plus, i'm enjoying it.

Gotta wait for tax return to get in... then i'll see what the next few months has in store. Until then, class passing needs to get done.

Sucked into the world of school

2008-04-01T08:40:04Z

I'm sorta avoiding this place. Its usually the Brood-Sector. I'm trying not to. Instead, i'm engulfing myself into trying to pass classes. I'm gonna take a nap now. I think my brain has absorbed all it can for my 2 tests today. If I fail them, I fail them. Thats about it.

I thought about staying up the entire time... that never works. I get too bored in the last few hours before armageddon. Even though i'm not sleepy, i'm tired of studying. Blar. Maybe I'll play a video game.

Cracked out on Coffee, energy drinks, and cigarettes. Study aids, yessum!

Hell Yeah!

2008-03-27T02:35:30Z

Lacey sent me a link to the Elfquest site... and they're starting to post all the comics online for free. Yes. Awesomeness.

Go read some Elfquest.... or, in the least... look at the pics. Legendary art of the ages. These books were like crack in elementary school.

Driving to the store is too much effort.

2008-03-26T06:08:10Z

I'm totally hungry. I'm watching Kamen Rider Den-O, (remembered I had files) and now i'm getting the marathon munchies. I slept earlier today... for no reason, so now i'm totally awake. It just takes forever to drive somewhere to get food and back.

In class

2008-03-24T22:11:01Z

I'm in chemistry class. My laptop is noisy, and running hot... but I got the external wireless adapter back from my sister, so i'm using it in class... Instead of paying attention. We're not covering anything, really... and I should be studying for my test tomorrow. I dont think i'll have ALL of it on a great basis, but I should be able to pass it? Hopefully. I studied last night, and have been studying today.

Its easier to be "mobile"... even though this beast is HEAVY as FUCK. I need a better one. One day... right now, I need to get things going on the website, and whatever. I need to focus on one project. I hate having too many things in my head... always vying for attention. I lose hope and concentration on one given goal. Sometimes I want to be a superdork, and just be good at learning. But then there are other things which require my immediate attention.

I'm ADD, for real. My conscious mind tells me so. I've learned I can not control it. Thats why, in just ONE day, I cant sit around and concentrate on only one task. I cant just read a book. I have a need (ADD generated) to do 3 or 4 different things. One cannot succeed at 3 or 4 different things at once, so you just sit inbetween each task for the entirety of the length of period you are doing "nothing".

This is what I learned from spring break.

Lahrz

2008-03-23T05:39:07Z

Ceiling Cat created the urfz and stuffs. No joke. Winnar is ceiling cat.

I've been unmotivated and whatnot. I cant even motivate to study. Terrible. Thats alright. I have a lvl 60 rogue, finally. Plus, i'm waiting for Cinematech to come on. And i've been listening to The National a lot-a lot of recent note.

Slept most of the break. Got nothing accomplished, as per usual. Plus, fighting off odd depression things (which is likely why I slept so much). I figure that I likely wont ever allow myself to have the sorts of fun I used to have. Thats something permanent, I'm starting to believe. If I were, I'd probably have an aneurysm or my heart would explode or something from the manic attack which would occur. Mania sucks.

Alright. I'm gonna go TRY to study so I dont fail my test on Tuesday.